Shanylle & Brian's Birth Story

SHANYLLE’S BIRTH 

Sometime in early July 2019, I received a simple photo via text, letting me know my friend was expecting a little seashell in “March 2020”. A bitch SCREAMED as waves of emotion surged through my body, spreading goosebumps over my entire epidermis. My mermaid was gestating!! I secretly sparkled that she would invite me into her birth space.

A Mermaid’s Proposal

“Along the water, amongst the trees

A doula proposed, but not on her knees

Inside her womb, she’s growing a seed

So she asked for support to obtain her birth dreams

She presented a bag full of cute mermaid things

And asked this doula to swim with her upstream

To protect her space while she does her thing

To document the waves that’ll birth her baby queen

With a gush of emotions, my huge smile gleamed

I accept, with surprise..

for this proposal was not forseen

My humble heart full of gratitude; I know what this means

A time in space to combine Dominican doula magic to cosmic light beams ”

-AimeeBlaze

Shortly after, I realized Shanylle didn’t really need me to doula her through her pregnancy. She did an amazing job at using her own doula skills on herself. We painted the baby’s room, made a belly cast, had a beautiful little mama blessing.. & waited for baby.

Fast Forward to February 3rd, 2020. I It’s 2am, I just got home from a LONG, very emotionally draining birth.. 

I’m showered, in bed, deeply breathing and drifting when I get a text from Shany telling me she thinks she may be in labor. I ALMOST DIED!!! I said 77 very heartfelt intentional prayers to baby to give me at least 24 hours to recover. Babygirl gave me a whole week :) 

February 9th 2020, on my way from a Birth Worker presentation to an empowerment event, a girl was feeling great when I got the call that Shanylle’s midwife suggested that I pull up. I  dropped all plans and eagerly dashed home for my doula bag + camera bags & was on my way! 

Arriving at Shanylle’s house around 7pm, I encountered her hyper little 4 year old bouncing off the walls, her husband, mother, aunt & her aunt’s dog all in the living room. Shany was nowhere in sight (which made me giggle- I knew she was hiding). I place my belongings in a corner & quietly walk upstairs to find Shanylle in bed with her Midwife sitting beside her chatting. She was still in early labor.

After a few more bounces on his mami’s bed, Cairo was kicked out- along with Tia and her dog lol. Now the space was ready for some delicious vibrations. Making ourselves comfortable, Papi Abuela and I cleaned up and organized the home. I burned Palo Santo, diffused oils, set a little birth alter, dimmed lighting, played Summer Walker, Ari Lennox.. you know- made shit vibey. For the remainder of the night, Shanylle ate, bounced on her ball, ate some more, drank water, sang, laughed & finally rested a bit. Her surges were uncomfortable but bearable. 

For the first time, I showered & slept on someone’s couch during a birth- and not a hospital chair. GAME CHANGER!!!! 

By the morning, Brian had gotten us some breakfast sandwiches and did a supermarket run with very specific requests from Shany. “Florida oranges in the box Brian- NOT THE BAG.” Shany ate some more, showered, watched tv, did some yoga stretches, bounced on the ball & tried sending me home multiple times because “nothing was happening”. I ignored her requests for some time. Her midwife came back to check on her & said everything looked perfect, as it should. Shany wanted to “get things going” so she took some Evening Primrose oil capsules & lunged up her stairs for about an hour. Seeing that she was chillen- I offered her space. I told her I was going to run out for a few things at Five Below, she insisted she needed some air and tagged along. She instantly regretted this decision (which she didn’t tell me until long after her birth -facepalm). After our rainy drive back, Shany quietly got on all fours over her yoga ball and stayed that way until she went for a bath. I knew that the shift in her demeanor, quiet moans & need for solitude meant that her labor was intensifying. I sneaked into the bathroom while she was soaking in the tub with meditation music on & I knew by her moans she was in transition. 

I spoke to her mom and husband and as soon as she got out of that bath, the show was on. This labor went from slow to Precipitous VERY quickly. I called the midwife, Brian filled the tub, Abuela heated up lots of pots of water. Shany’s moans quickly turned into powerful ROARS. She was on all fours again on her mat. Her head was down as her team prepared for baby’s arrival. She picked her head up one time to make eye contact with me- she said SOMEONE NEEDS TO CALL THE MIDWIFE. I’M BOUT TO HAVE THIS BABY!!  I reassured her that the midwife was on her way. 

The midwife arrived moments later, she observed Shany and reluctantly supported her decision to get in the birthing tub. Being that there was still very little water in there, she suggested the birthing stool instead but there was no way Shany was having that. That mermaid needed her water. Soothing Abuela, translating for the midwife, encouraging Shanylle and keeping an eye on Brian, I made sure everything was recording correctly, as I knew babygirl was just moments away from meeting us earth side. 

A wave of nervous/excited energy rushed over my body as this culminating moment approached - the baby’s head was crowning, Shany was making sounds I’d never heard before, mama’s face was full of emotion and so was mine!!! 

Seconds later, baby Sereia emerges, Shanylle exhales- totally relieved. On a super birth high that her partner was feeling too. The energy in the air is ABSOLUTELY ETHEREAL! 

My first home birth. In deep, humble, gratitude, I continue to document and support.

As Shanylle lay on the couch with her new baby, her husband gets her favorite drink and admires them both. The midwife and her assistant empty the tub & clean up everything!! It’s almost as if nothing happened in that dining room. 

After the placenta finished pulsing, Brian cut the umbilical cord, and they slowly transfer to their bedroom, where the midwives checked the baby thoroughly to ensure everything was as it should be. Shanylle laid, rested, hydrated, fed her baby, ate some more, and enjoyed her night, right in the home where she conceived, gestated, labored, and delivered her sweet babygirl. In typical Shanylle fashion, she kept the name to herself for one more night. 

When I left her house that night, my exhausted face formed a gleaming smile from ear to ear as I bathed in an ocean of pure heartfelt joy- not only for the family, but for myself. I knew with unwavering certainty that my career would be taking a turn for the better, that I would be encouraging my mamas to strongly consider birthing in a more private, respected setting. A different level of maximum comfort and trust induced relaxation that I would love for others to experience. The absence of interruptions, unwanted energy, and unwarranted stress all promoted the whole house to be calm, have fun, and stay present and connected to the process.

Baby Sereia, what a blessing it is to have witnessed and documented your birth on this earth. HAPPY FIRST BIRTHDAY!

Shanylle, what a magickal gift to be invited into your home - your heart, as your birth keeper, documentarian & sistar.

Brian & Cai - ya’ll the homies for life!! We make a good ass team! Let me know when ya’ll ready for another round!! :) 

What is a Doula Anyway?

Dou.la (ˈdo͞olə/)

a person professionally trained to provide emotional, physical and educational support to a birthing person and their family before, during, and after childbirth.

Aimee as your Doula

As a doula, and a womxn, I am full of love- incredible,  sensational, riveting, whole-hearted, non-judgmental, nurturing, supportive love.  I will give you all the levels of comfort, spoiling, and support; tools for strength, self advocacy and self healing, in the unique ways that you need. I will get to know you, as much as you will let me, and that will help me, help you, have the best chance at the empowered birth you desire, and equally importantly, the healthiest start to your very own version of motherhood.

My Social Work background helps me help you be a fierce advocate for yourself. My photography/videography skills will give you some amazing imagery to hold dear for lifetimes to come, if you so desire. Choosing me as your doula, will give you layers benefits. Meet with me to find out more :)     

 (Consultations are always free of charge!)

Why Do I Need a Doula?

There are many reasons why more birthing people are choosing to have a doula. For one, since the majority of births in the US take place at a hospital, institutional routines create a high intervention environment with bright lights, needles, lack of privacy, strangers walking in and out, amongst other interruptions. 

This can be difficult for one to deal with, even when feeling our best. Can you imagine trying to advocate for yourself being in the vulnerable state of labor and delivery? These conditions are very likely to decrease progression in labor and deplete self confidence. Having a birth doula present providing continuous support in the way that the specific family needs, the mother’s self esteem is much more likely to be kept in tact. 

Another reason why doulas are effective in a birth space has a lot to do with the attachment between a birthing person and a doula which can increase natural levels of oxytocin. Oxytocin is known to increase labor contractions, decrease stress, fear, and anxiety. The calming effect of a doula’s presence increases the mother’s own pain coping hormones(beta-endorphins), making labor feel less painful (Ulnas Moberg, 2014).

Studies conclude that doula support has a clinically meaningful impact on anxiety and pain levels in birthing people.  

I’m a Science Person, Show me the Statistics

As per Evidence Based Birth,

• Doulas provide evidence based education to the family.

• 31% decrease in the risk of being dissatisfied with the birth experience with continuous support by a doula

• Shorter labors by 41 minutes on average

• 10% decreased in the use of medication for pain relief

• 25% decrease in the chance of unnecessary Cesarean

• 8% increase in chances to have a spontaneous vaginal birth

What do you mean ‘Physical Support’?

Providing physical support is imperative to a laboring person. This includes but is not limited to:

• Applying hot/cold therapy (compress/towel/fan/heating pad)

• Soothing touch

• Massage, counter pressure

• Stretching techniques, positioning assistance, use of exercise ball

• Assistance with water therapy (shower/tub)

• Creating peaceful environment to client’s liking. This can include dim lighting, candles, salt lamp, drawn curtains, soothing music and aromas (depending on birthing space regulations) flowers, small plants.. the list goes on! It varies case by case.

What about ‘Emotional Support’?

Emotional support is just as important as the physical; they go hand in hand. It helps the birthing person feel loved an nurtured, resulting in a sense of peace, pride, and empowerment once the baby is born. 

• Praise,encouragement, affirmations, reassurance

• Continuous presence, keeping company

• Helping the birthing person and family perceive themselves or their situation in a positive light

• Accepting the desires of the birthing person

• Assist in diminishing fears and self-doubt for both the birthing person & birth partner

Will A Doula Take The Place of My Partner?

Absolutely not. While your doula has a huge role on the big day, the birth partner is an essential support person to the birthing person. They know you and how to love you best. Ideally, the partner and the doula will work together to make the birth experience as smooth, safe, and sacred as possible. However, the  partner is also experiencing an emotional journey, and will need support, which is where the doula comes in for them as well. While your partner teaches the doula about you, the doula will teach the partner about birth.

Furthermore, most birth partners have limited knowledge about medical procedures, birth, and/or sometimes, they’re unsure about what is going on emotionally with the birthing person. Doulas are trained professionals; therefore they usually deal better with situations that could be overwhelming for the partner. I’ve found it best to let the partner enjoy the experience along with the mother, rather than try and play both roles.  

Also, if for whatever reason the partner has to leave the birth space, neither of you will ever worry about you being alone. If you want to be held and connect with your partner while also getting a message to relieve pressure, you won’t have to choose. You can have both. If you’re feeling incredibly attached to your partner, but you need water or ice chips or whatever else, your doula can do that while your partner stays by your side nonstop and vice versa. 

With that being said, no two families are alike. I fill the need of each individual family. If it is the desire of the birthing person, my goal is to use the birth experience to help the family connect and become closer.

What if I want a Doula, but my partner is not on board yet?

This is more common than you may think. Many partners do not feel comfortable with the idea of having an extra person in the room that they have not yet met. They may not understand the value of having an experienced birth professional to help their birthing partners in ways that they may not know how. For this reason, I always suggest that the partner attend our initial meeting (which is free of charge/no obligation), so they can have all of their questions/concerns heard and addressed. 

It is ideal for the couple to feel 100% comfortable with the doula they are choosing for the best birth outcome. I usually win the partners over at our first meeting, and I have yet to hear, “ Gee, I wish we didn’t have a doula at our birth, it would’ve helped to be alone.”  Please do not hesitate to include your partners on this birth team choosing process!   

What if I want a medicated birth? Will a Doula still be beneficial for me? 

Absolutely!! Doulas are meant to support you whatever way you choose to birth. I can assist you with different safe positions to assist with baby’s descend more rapidly. I can still grab whatever you need for you (water, chapstick, ice chips ect.) I can also set a soothing tone in your birth space with soft music, aromatherapy, dim lighting, and whatever else you may desire (as long as the birth space allows). Not only informational support but also loads of emotional support and catering during this vulnerable time. 

What if I end up with a Cesarean Section or if I elect a scheduled Cesarean Section?

A doula is still essential in these situations. From early labor to postpartum, a doula will support in different ways. If the hospital allows a doula in the OR, I will absolutely be there the entire time. If this is especially imperative to you, I can help you find a doctor that supports having doulas in the OR. 

If you are electing a scheduled C-Section, I can customize a package for you with additional prenatal and postpartum visits, as well as emotional, informational, and some physical support pre-ooperatavly. 

What is the difference between a Doula vs. a Midwife?

A Midwife attends birth as a medical professional; they are supportive, but their main role is to monitor the birthing person + the baby’s health during the prenatal period, birth and usually at least one postpartum care visit. The Midwife is also often the one catching the baby. A Doula is not trained to provide any clinical support such as cervical checks, blood pressure/heart rate monitoring, or baby catching. The Doula’s main role is to provide high levels of full support to the birthing person and their birth team. 

The VBAC Birth of Luna Indira

Luna Indira, 6.18.17

My Midwife and Doula loving on me & baby Luna minutes after birth



This time, baby was planned, and so was my VBAC (Vaginal Birth After Cesarean). I had just attended my first birth as a documentarian- which by the way was PURE MAGIC! (Click here to see for yourself!) Little did I know then, that I was already newly pregnant! Naturally, this time around, I wanted exactly what I had just witnessed. A(n unmedicated) vaginal birth with the support of a doula and midwife. This whole pregnancy was so different. Everything was intentional and all decisions came from an educated place. 39 weeks came along and my midwife advised me to kick it up a notch, physically. She was concerned that I would go over 40 weeks and the hospital would start pressuring me to have another Cesarean- that shook me! So on top of the weekly yoga classes, I was speed walking A LOT, climbing stairs, bouncing on the exercise ball, squatting, pumping, spicy food, ginger tea, you name it. 2 days prior to my Guess Date, labor began. I went to my yoga class (which happened to be lead by my doula) with my daughter and partner. We bonded and relaxed as I contracted in the most peaceful way. I moved and rested throughout the rest of the day. Around midnight I decided to try and get some sleep, which is when the contractions intensified - not letting me sleep one bit. I rocked, swayed, got in the tub, and then  made my way to the hospital once my contractions were 5 minutes apart. The pains were sooo intense by then, I had never experienced anything like it. I was trying to focus on visualizing my water birth, but boy it was so hard! The hospital said I was considered “high risk” because I was a VBAC (insert hard eye roll) and couldn’t get in the tub- my hope for pain relief. Nothing else seemed to be putting me at ease. I received a (very rough) cervical exam where the attending scoffed “you’re barely half a centimeter” at me, which was beyond disheartening. Especially after laboring hard and peacefully at home, I felt desperate and wasn’t able to get that number out of my head. I was fighting my body & loosing with each surge. At this point, that epidural i’d been offered 3x was sounding verrrrrry appealing, I was ready to rest! My doula, partner and bestie reminded me of my plan for an unmedicated birth and I thugged it out through a few more contractions but ultimately I chose to get the epidural.

I was so disappointed in myself for giving in;  I thought I was setting myself up for another Cesarean, after months of hard work towards a vaginal birth. After a few tears, pep talks, laughs, and naps, I was able to relax. I believe it's because I was so calm that I was at 9cm when I was checked again at noon. At that time, with the mindset I had and the limitations the hospital put on me, I wouldn't have been able to relax enough to open up with such intense contractions. On Sunday, June 18th 2017, at 1:13pm after 19 minutes of pushing, healthy baby Luna Indira was earthside and ready to meet her family! It was the best Father's day gift the universe and I could have ever given Danny and the abuelos.

I couldn't have done it the way I did without my team!!

While I am grateful for my vaginal birth, if I knew then what I know now boyyyyy- I would have made very different decisions. It ALMOST makes me want to do it again- but I know that’s my ego talking, wanting to prove a point to myself. So instead, I dedicate my life to walking alongside families navigating transitions- and I LOVE it!!

The Cesarean Birth of Nyla Madison

Nyla Madison, 3.13.13

My first born was an unplanned, non-emergent Cesarean Section. At the beginning of my pregnancy, my lack of health insurance lead me a community clinic where I felt like ˜just another chart”. When my insurance finally came through, most OB’s wouldn’t take me because I was so far along (27 weeks). I had a long list of OB’s that accepted my insurance, the only male was the last one- because surely I wouldn’t have to get even close to the bottom of the list before finding someone, right? Wrong! I was forced to set aside my hang-ups around having a male provider pretty quickly.

When my OB finally accepted me into the practice, I was so relieved that I basically worshiped him!The fact that him and his staff were all people of color gave me a feeling of comfort and trust.  I was so grateful to have a doctor that made me feel great, deliver my baby. Along came 39 weeks, 5 days and baby girl was facedown, but my Cervix hadn’t shown any signs that she was ready to descend. The doctor nonchalantly says, “Well, it looks like I might not be here to see this baby be born after all, I’m going on vacation at the end of the week.” My jaw drops and my heart rate spikes as I fully panicked at the thought of not knowing who would be taking care of me for my birth. To relieve my panic, he asked if I’d like to be induced. Not knowing better and making an emotion based decision, I (basically yelled) “YES PLEASE!!” So off to the hospital I go (with my partner & bestie, but no doula). I receive a round of Cervidil (a synthetic medication inserted through the vagina, used to prepare your cervix- the lower opening of the womb- for labor and delivery.) After 12 hours of monitoring and basically just chilling in the bed, no signs of active labor. (of course not, baby/mybody weren’t ready and I was confined to a bed with very minimal physical activity. I got another round of Cervidil, which was supposed to last another 12 hours. 9 hours, no food, and many, MANY uncomfortable (& unnecessary) vaginal checks later, the doctor said “Okay, there’s no dilation. This isn’t working so it’s time for plan B. Let’s just get this baby out.”  At that point, I was starving, headachy, defeated and ready to stop having strangers’ fingers in my vagina. I agreed to the Cesarean. At 11:43pm, just minutes shy of her EDD (estimated due date) a star was born from the cosmos. I was relieved, super high, and scared to drop my brand new baby when I first held her. The hospital staff took her up for a bath while I was in recovery, alone (daddy followed the baby, bestie was beat after 26 hours & went home). I didn’t actually get to see and hold my baby until 3:30am. And at this time, I felt that my birth story was totally normal and I was obliviously happy. 

Once I began to learn more about birth, there are SOOO many things that used to make me cringe about my birth story. I judged myself harshly for my lack of education, for my relaxed demeanor around the obstetric injustices & disrespect. It wasn’t until I stopped judging myself that I realized that I was meant to have this experience exactly how it happened. This way I can relate to other Cesarean mamas, I would experience the power of a VBAC, I would know first hand how to help clients avoid certain situations by asking the questions I didn’t know to ask. I am so grateful for my experience as a first time mama.

Emmy & Jon's Birth Story

I met this couple at a cute coffee shop in Montclair on 8.5.19. 

They were beautiful, melanin rich light beams of love. I sparkled that they’d see the same in me & of course, the universe supported our connection & here we are.

Emmy knew exactly the type of pregnancy, labor & birth experience she wanted. Calm, peaceful, based in powerful love, and as natural as possible. Together we were able to manifest just that. On 2/2/2020, Emmy labored calmly at home with her team for about 14 hours before we transferred to the birth center. 

The Midwives were so kind, gentle, reassuring and respectful of the transition of spaces. They had the bath already filled upon arrival, they quickly connected her birth playlist, offered her hydration, dimmed the lights and supported Jon and Emmy in every way possible. It was deeply beautiful to be a part of this space and mother-centered experience. 

Caitlyn, the Midwife, noticed some complications with baby & suggested a hospital transfer. She knew how much Emmy and Jon wanted to avoid the hospital & kept that in mind when gently communicating this news to them. The way she was able to validate Emmy & Jon’s feelings while not shoving them out the door in a panic made a huge difference  in the disappointing transfer of spaces. 

Upon arrival to the hospital (5 min car transfer) the energy shift was so real!! The hospital staff was in emergency mode & luckily, the midwife was a great buffer for all of us; the bridge between their medical & emotional wellbeing. The decision was made that Emmy needed a C-section and she was quickly wheeled away to the OR, while Jon nervously put on the scrubs that were shoved at his chest. I was hurried out of the room and into the waiting room. Healthy Baby Boy Jonem was born via cesarean; eventually mom was okay & dad was able to breathe again. A new chapter has begun.

BEHIND THE SCENES FROM THE DOULA’S PERSPECTIVE

I LOVE that Emmy’s labor experience was everything she wanted it to be. Calm, quiet, romantic, connected, familiar, full of trust, love and support. Seeing a black womxn’s strength and power is medicine to my soul.

Everything from early labor through the birth center was delicious. 

That hospital transfer though- THAT was traumatizing. 

Upon arrival, I was asked not to film Emmy’s experience. I absolutely feel some type of way that many hospitals don’t allow filming to protect themselves legally. If they are doing everything correctly and ethically, then why are they scared to let a womxn’s story be captured? 

Once the decision was made for her to have a C-section, Jon and I were left in the empty hospital room, staring at the blank space that Emmy’s bed occupied just minutes before. Snapping us back into reality, someone came in and shoved disposable scrubs into Jon’s chest, instructing him to put them on quickly. As the tears filled his lash line, threatening to pour over at any moment, my heart sank to the pit of my stomach. I rushed to collect all of our things, ready to hold space for Jon as he awaited the green light to enter the OR. It’s as if he was finally letting himself feel- rather than be a pillar for his partner. 

And just like that, I found myself on the other side of the Labor & Delivery wing entrance. The hospital staff didn’t allow me to stay with him. It was truly heartbreaking. 

Shortly after, the midwife text me to notify me that the baby was born healthy, but that Emmy had to be put to sleep and we had to wait for her to wake up. My heart immediately clenched and my mind became the devil’s playground. I could no longer hold my emotions. I walked into that bathroom and sobbed my little eyes out. I was so scared. Sad. Disappointed. Defeated. Why did she need a section? Why the fuck was she put to sleep? Why hasn’t she woken up? Why Can’t I be with them? Could I have done anything differently? Why hadn’t I gotten an update? 

I paced a hole into the waiting room floor,  for it had been HOURS before I knew anything. Finally, I get news that Emmy woke up and “seemed to be doing well.” All I could think about was “how could she be ‘doing well’ if she doesn’t even have her baby, her partner or her doula by her side? How could she be ‘doing well’ if she has a deep fear of hospitals and the insanely high number of black maternal mortality in the US- and now she’s alone.  

It was such an emotional roller coaster, combined with lack of rest & adequate nutrients, ya girl was depleted as a mother. With that being said, I wanted to wait to see Em & get some footage for her video— so I stayed.  

When I was finally able to see her, she wasn’t even Emmy. She was pale and zombified; holding her baby next to her emotionally exhausted partner in a dull, cold, emotionless hospital room. I was bombarded with an array of opposing feelings.  There was great gratitude for their physical health. Relief that they were okay. So deeply saddened for their spirits, so disappointed in their surroundings & the way that their birth story ended… 

After 24 hours of support, I drove 40 minutes to drop off her placenta, then another 10 minutes home, in complete silence. Depleted and defeated. 

It’s 2am, I’m showered, in bed, deeply breathing when I get a text. My next client tells me she thinks she may be in labor. I ALMOST DIED…..